I had a very strange incident last weekend, one that indicated that either some very stupid thieves stopped by, or my old stalker left me a message.

Saturday morning I noticed that the hood of my car was not fully shut. I opened it expecting to see my battery gone, but everything was in place. Something distracted me before I could look inside the car and with all the company and cooking and fireworks, I never got back to my car all day.

Sunday morning, though, I discovered that my XM radio was gone. Not the antenna, not the wiring, just the radio. Which has a specific serial number that must be activated, making it absolutely useless to sell or pawn. Not to mention that they are dirt cheap.

It was also obvious that someone had gone through my glove box. Papers were scattered on the floor and the little book cover that holds the manual was empty but zipped. I have never, ever zipped it. Someone had also gone through the center console and made sure I knew about that, too, because a CD was in the driver's seat. But the console on the dashboard, the one with the GPS in it? -- completely untouched. The small air compressor on the front porch, just a few feet away? -- also untouched. However, the skirt in a Macy's bag in the back seat was gone, although the bag was still there. Oh, and one more thing, the 18-month old open pack of cigarettes that I keep to remind me that not smoking is a choice, not an obligation -- they were gone, too. The things that were missing were very personal, not valuable, and things that only I would notice

So either I was visited by a cross-dressing, tobacco-addicted thief who took something that would do him no good at all, or my ex-husband paid a visit. (I should note here, NOT the father of my children.) I divorced this man 26 years ago and I moved away, so I know this sounds paranoid to even suggest. But he was one of those evil control freaks who stalked me and did horrible things for years. One of his favorite things to do during his reign of terror was unscrew my outside light bulbs. The message was very clear: I can get as close to you as I want and there's nothing you can do to stop me. Is that the message he thought he was leaving this time?

The timing is right. We used to camp on Bolivar Peninsula on holiday weekends and I'm sure he would have come down to see for himself what Ike did. And it's easy enough to google me and find out where I live. So maybe he decided to drive by my house and see what kind of damage I had. What made him decide to leave me a message? Who knows! Maybe someone dumped him, or he got laid off, or the Professor's Corvette made him jealous. He is very cunning, and he probably figured it would drive me crazy trying to decide if it was stupid thieves or him.

But you know what? I spent about an hour trying to figure it all out, and then realized that it didn't matter a bit. Nothing of value is gone. It appears that the intent was to make me feel vulnerable and scared. But he can't scare me anymore. I know that I am smarter than he is, I am stronger than he is, and I am getting the best revenge, which is living well. This whole thing has made me realize that the fear and anger are completely gone, and all that's left is a faint whiff of regret that he did not live up to his potential, and a lot of contempt.

So if it was stupid thieves, well, I hope they enjoy the skirt and the very stale cigarettes. I may be paranoid or not but I don't really care. My life is very good and it will take a lot more than an a**hole, known to me or not, to scare me.