The scene: the parking lot of Wendy's. My bag lunch is on the seat, my car window is still down, and I have pulled into an empty spot to check the voice mail I just missed. As I put in my pin number, I become aware of a flapping noise. I turn my head to see a seagull hovering about six inches from my face. Had his wingspan been narrower, he would have flown right in. As I frantically raise the window, I realize there are about 30 seagulls all around me. They start to squawk, and some take flight to perch on the top of my car. As I listen to my message, they settle down but don't leave. Now I can't resist. I lower my window a bit -- bedlam! I close it -- they settle down. I was drunk on the power for a few minutes. I decided not to create a riot by tossing out a french fry or two (anyway, they were mine.)

The lesson: never stop in that parking lot with french fries in the car.